Saturday, February 20, 2016

Giving Up On My Books

Nah this is not a joke
It's exhausting being the main one that's representing hope
When everyone else is just distracted so that they don't have to cope
While I'm climbing up a mountain and they are sliding down a slope

If I trade in my books
To make room for love from a man
So that he can call me beautiful while he reaches to grab my hand
So that he can text me everyday well, then I can quit right then
And proceed to be distracted, man, I would fit right in

If he shows up to my place with a hand full of roses
Then I can push away the people, who to me are the closest
I would laugh in their face if they ever had something to say
Since they are the ones who showed me life's more meaningful with a bae

Doesn't even matter if he's connected and his intentions house impurity
Doesn't matter if he's broken and unaware of his insecurities
As long as when you look into his eyes, you feel some sense of surety
And after sex, you trade obscurity for a pseudo sense of security

I should shut the hell on up with all this talk about originality
About energy, self-love, forgiveness, spirituality
About balance, conditioning, contingency, practicality
About building an empire, financial freedom, connectedness and duality

Why should I be the only one putting pressure on myself
To generate inspiration, to generate some wealth
When everyone in this world was born with God-given talents
Then they decide to waste it by the liters, waste it by the gallons

Years pass on by and their dreams stay parked and dormant
Maybe they've given up on life, threw in a flag or they forfeit
Maybe they were sick of water flowing, so they turned off the faucet
Maybe they are afraid because their dreams are illustrious and enormous

So they've decided to super settle for the relationship illusion
Where a steamy sexual connection makes them feel a little inclusion
Where they focus less on themselves and way more on forming a union
They are in a lane filled with stagnation but the music's bumpin' and they're cruisin'

And here I, here I go, giving up Saturday and Fridays nights
Working on perfecting my marketing til I fucking get it right
Trynna blind the whole world so our futures will be bright
While they keep ignoring, partying, sexing, til they fucking get it right

There is absolutely nothing about this process that's automatic
And I'm bending and I'm bending like I'm an gymnast or I'm acrobatic 
I am still dealing with all of the events in my life that were traumatic 
While I still find a way to be honest, personable and charismatic  

I know we are all different but what, but what is their excuse
Is it a lack of inspiration or more of a desire to let loose
They said that they believe in God but I'm starting to not believe them
They have dreams living inside of them but decide not to achieve them

What a waste of a dream, Martin Luther King would be sad
But don't you worry though, that person you're with is probably glad
Cuz if you were manifesting dreams you'd invest in solitude and be MIA
Why would they want you to be centered when you show more love when you stray 

They think you are so kind the way you invest in their illusion
They believe that it's loyalty, oh how funny of their delusion
They cannot handle your strength, but boy, they can handle your confusion
And they too mistake the steamy sexual connection with you for the feeling of inclusion

As I look into the mirror and then take a look down at my books
And I glance into the covers to remind myself of how they look
I think of all the sleepless nights, courage and energy that it took
Still can't believe I wrote the lyrics, wrote the chorus, wrote the hook

And to think at any moment I can throw it all away
I can also become distracted, I can also go astray 
From what I know that I deserve like the people whom I love
And I can say that it doesn't fit, and I uhh quit, like OJ's glove

I can run into the arms of a strong, strong man
With a dimple, it's so simple, fall for his strong, strong hands
And I along with everyone else can watch this life of mine unravel
Down the toilet goes my dreams of wealth, prosperity and travel

I'm not saying it'd be his fault, I'm not even saying he couldn't help
But before I focus on a "him" I need to focus on myself
Not many people showed me that, man, I had to show myself
I cannot help anyone else glow until I learn to glow myself
I cannot help anyone else glow until I learn to glow myself
I cannot help anyone else grow until I learn to grow myself
I cannot help anyone else go until I learn to go myself
I cannot help anyone else flow until I learn to flow myself 

Okay now this is getting long so I guess I can conclude
Been feeling like this for a while now and I didn't wanna elude
What if I gave up on my dreams or agreed to put in as much work as you
What if I gave up on my dreams and only put in as much work as you

Why should I be the only one who is always feeling all this pressure
Y'all are gifted and smart too but you gotta dig to find the treasure 
I love helping and inspiring, I swear I swear I swear I do
But what if I gave up on my dreams and only put in as much work as you

And please don't draw a blank, I won't accept that you don't know
Everyone should be aware of the show they're putting on for people sitting in their front row

Unless otherwise noted, All content © Brittney Pressley, 2016

Tuesday, January 26, 2016

Organic Love

Used to think real love was gettin married n' shit
Gettin swept off my feet gettin carried n' shit
Didn't know love was dynamic, that love varied n' shit
Too busy looking for Paul, James, Mike, Larry n' shit

Thought finding "true" love would solve all answers
Solve all pain, all headaches, all cancers
Bring no illusions, no drama, no banter
Didn't know I needed self-worth, had no standards

Well I had standards but they were all passed down
Gettin compliments for outer beauty, gettin gassed now
Making sure I always had a boo, they never asked how
Now I'm almost 28 looking back into my past now

I was searching for something that was inside of me
"Just find you a man, girl" is what they implied to me
Dope, so having great sex was a joyride for me
But our connection shouldn't be strongest when you're inside of me
I was kinda pissed when I realized that they lied to me
All this information on self-love, why would they hide from me
When I trust them to be the ones who are guiding me
Now I'm sorting through all the bullshit that they supplied to me

Happiness is not something that anyone else can bring
Especially when you haven't found your voice so that you can sing
They never teach you to be yourself but say you need a King
Then you get way caught up in some exclusive flings

The gems I needed to know first were the following:
How to connect to my soul without it hollowing
How to stand up instead of being on my back hollering
How to pay attention to action, not to what they promising
How to focus on my deepest desires without me wandering
How it's okay to be a curious, intellectual pondering
How to take constructive feedback without it bothering
How to build a club, not be at the club wallowing

Oh, and how self-love is not just some theory man
That's a derivative of Walt Disney or FairyLand
Through it is how you evolve, so don't be weary man
Self-love is how you get to God, it's not that eerie man

They want you to be stressed out trynna save the world
But you can't save the woman if you don't save the little girl
That lives inside of her, so in fact before they can swirl
She's got to crack the oyster open, that's how she'll get the pearl

Essentially this is why I wear glasses and write books now
Ha, I'm playing but you can actually call me a crook now
Cuz I'm stealing all the illusions, don't care how it looks now
Open Your Mind Before You Open Your legs, that's the hook now

Unless otherwise noted, All content © Brittney Pressley, 2016

Monday, December 21, 2015

Single Moms in Black Culture

I watched a video the other day of a Black woman explaining how Polygamy would heal Black culture. I can't get into her reasoning right now cuz it's a waste of my personal energy but I felt sad and inspired. Sad because our culture is so disconnected, we feel that throwing an illusion-based solution on top of it would solve hundreds of years of intentional oppression. Inspired because it made me really think about the issues that we're dealing with. One of the main problems I see is broken families - no infrastructure, no foundation. And no one can build upward without a solid foundation. We can't repair a leak while the water is still running. The leak is the weak, if not, non-existent family structure. The running water is the continued pregnancy and repeated cycles - we are compounding the issue. Instead of rebuilding the children that are already here and broken, and the families that already exist and are broken, we create new children and new families, or "families". We are numb to baby daddy's, baby mamas, and broken homes.

Because after a while, dysfunction will become the norm if it's never addressed.

Some people have the right idea but it fails. For example, a woman notices and finally accepts that the broken man that she chose to be her child's father isn't going to help her in raising their child or that his presence does more damage than healing, so she brings in someone to help. A lot of the times that "someone" is the dude she's sleeping with (another broken man if she hasn't addressed and dealt with her voids). Even if he has his own kids, his intention is to slide between her legs, not play daddy to her precious little babies. Does he want more? Maybe. Does he need more? Absolutely. No telling if he's connected to his deeper-level desires though so a lot of them just run with sex. But she puts her kids onto him to some degree because she's desperate to not only repair what's been broken but to show her kids a solid family structure. So as I said, her intention is there but it fails because of his intentions. He's trynna escape, not fall in love or 'fall in family'. And even if he's family-oriented, he probably has his own to provide for which is his priority. And if he's not even providing for his kids, why are you expecting that he's gonna be a Super Dad to yours?

And you can't tell me that he cares all that much about your kids that aren't his. He cares about them as much as he cares about you. If he cares about your kids more, you may wanna check that just a little. It takes time to build trust, build connections, and to purify intentions - even with children. He isn't all that connected to your kids, trust me. He's attached to what he's getting from you but understands that your kids are apart of it. What really should be happening is that the "someone" who is brought in to reinforce is purely connected to your child's growth and overall well-being. An uncle, brother, cousin, family friend, etc. I'm not saying that the guy you're with has ill intentions, I'm just saying that his intentions for being in your life and for helping with your kids, benefits him more than it does you or your child. Think respect, status, "power", establishing himself.  
We are all here to be used, not taken advantage of. #TheresADifference

With that, single mothers are extremely vulnerable in this world but especially in our culture. She wants the best for her children and wants to afford them a certain lifestyle. Not all are willing to give up morals to any dude that comes along waving rescue, money, or a meal ticket but a lot do. Again, her intention is there but his exists as well. The dude that comes along who takes your "stress away" a.k.a gives you a distraction, gives you a couple of dollars for your kids, pays some bills, or whatever, looks golden to you; you'll feel indebted to him. I mean, he is doing more than the biological dad who's doing much of nothing. Now you're overlooking red flags, his intentions, and the reality of who he is because you're desperate to repair your broken family that was created out of brokenness, and to relieve the guilt that you feel in playing apart in its demise.

I hear this a lot, "well if the men would step up and be men we wouldn't be single moms". But I'll challenge that and say, "if you were more aware of the type of men you were sleeping with overall and without a condom, and if you recognized that your power doesn't live between your legs, and if you weren't giving these deadbeats platforms to become dads, and if your mom didn't transfer her brokenness to you and instead showed you the proper way that a woman should act, think, and conduct herself then you wouldn't be a single mom." That really hurt as I wrote it because I know a lot of single moms who bust their asses, who put their children first, and who are the most giving and thoughtful people ever, however, we never address the back story, only the result of it!

It seems like the start of being a single mom begins with unprotected sex but it goes back further. At a young age, she's looking for love that she isn't getting at home. Either that, or she's trying to recreate the love that she saw at home, minus the context of how to get it or what it takes to sustain it. She was probably raised by a mother who was looking to the man she was currently sleeping with to fix her broken home, or who gave up her voice to the man she was dating or married to, or who was tricking just to get extra money to feed the family, or who was so broken that she had men running in and out of the house, or who was so caught up in her mental health issues that she wasn't really present, or who was barely paying attention because she was escaping with alcohol and drugs because she was running from her pain; thus creating physical, emotional, financial, and/or spiritual instability for her children. The mom's brokenness gets passed down to her daughter and the cycle continues. There's zero accountability in the men that she's allowing in her intimate space. There's zero accountability to the men she's allowing to be around her children. And there's even less accountability in the men she's choosing to procreate with. She's running on raw emotions, which leads to her letting him slide through raw. Then an innocent life is brought into the equation and immediately has to take on his or her parents' issues. The kids don't even get a fair shot. There are even women who tried to go through a more "traditional" route who are currently married or who got married before having children or who married their child's dad or who are currently divorced and are still single moms - dad is physically present but emotionally and spiritually absent. Or he's out cheating. Or escaping through whatever his mechanism is. Or he gives money here and there and feels as if that's enough. Or he starts a new family when he was barely an active member of the one he was previously apart of.

The broken homes are dying to be fixed.
The children are crying to be healed.
The single parents are vulnerable, and hopefully, desire yesterday.

I know that turning the water off seems like a basic solution but what if the ones of us without children dedicate our time, energy, and resources to build back up the families within our grasps. We deal with our own desperation and stop chasing after marriage and kids for a while, and start bridging the gap to build the structure and create the resources that our communities need. Bring back having fun, family game nights with no cell phones, cooking together, informal and formal mentorship, try to pay a bill for someone when you can or give them money to help with gas, or groceries, or diapers, or a field trip, whatever. Then we focus on re-introducing self-love and bring in intense therapy to first discuss and then heal the brokenness, redefining the responsibility of each parent, build back up the woman, build back up the man, build back up the mutual respect, and then we can talk about owning businesses, economic power, and overall unity.

But we have to be the hope and stop praying for answers. WE HAVE THE ANSWERS! WE ARE THE ANSWERS! No rescue is coming because we are the rescue.

cc: Open Your Mind Before You Open Your Legs

Unless otherwise noted, All content © Brittney Pressley, 2015

Sunday, December 13, 2015

Dear Mom

What's going on girl?
Just saying hi
Seems like I've been growing so much
And I don't even have to try

They say that life isn't fair
I've learned and I agree
They also say that the truth
Is what will really set you free

But there's such a thin line
Between truth and illusion
Between right and what's wrong
Between reality and delusion

Between morals and learned behavior
Between acceptable and disgusting
Between mistake and mental health
Between watching, between thrusting

Between forgiveness and forgetting
Though forget is what I will not do
Gotta keep the truth alive
Even when people tell you not to

Mom, guess what else I learned?
Sometimes you gotta clear it out
Instead of sweeping it under the rug
I've learned it's healthy to air it out

Oh, and my books are in six countries
Doing it all Independent
You know I never liked the rules
Always loved my independence

My friends are still really dope
They're the ones who keep me honest
That's why I can remain so laid back
And blunt but still remain the calmest

Oh, and I'm no longer afraid of the dark
Cuz through darkness comes the light
In light lives the truth
And for some the light is just too bright

So no matter what you tell them
No matter how you try to lead them
They run back to the darkness
Ultimately, decide to never leave him

And you wonder why they rerouted
Then they tell you that they are grown
So what they are essentially saying is
That they are stuck and haven't grown

And when someone hasn't grown
And you are so busy growing
You have no choice but to leave them behind
So that you can keep on going

Mom, guess what else I learned?
Some people will never be accountable
I've also learned that I am strong
No mountain or obstacle is insurmountable

Sometimes our family will laugh
And ask what has gotten into me
The truth is fairly simple
Been super connected to God energy

You know I like my drama minimal
Didn't write this so I can prank you
I wrote it cuz I reached a milestone
And really wanted to say thank you

Thank you for disconnecting
Because I needed to disconnect too
Instead of holding onto a faded picture
Cuz the world says I should respect you

No worries about that though
Cuz I will always respect myself
Oh, I'm down 21 pounds since that last text I sent
Been really conscious about my health

Got this self-love thing down pat
Been evolving into my wholeness
And I say what the fuck I want
Been evolving into my boldness

One thing I know for sure
Two things I know for certain
I know that I am a clown
Although I'll never be apart of a circus

Mom, guess what else I learned?
They may take from me and leave a hole
They can take from my emotions
But will never taint and take my soul


Unless otherwise noted, All content © Brittney Pressley, 2015

Thursday, November 19, 2015

She Couldn't Even Get a Hi From Me

She couldn't even get a hi from me
All truth, she couldn't even get a lie from me
She's so selfish and disrespectful, only cares about herself - no wonder she would never ever die for me
Cares about money, she probably wouldn't even cry for free
Tried to buy my love but she wasn't ever obliging me
She's so selfish and disrespectful, only cares about her wealth - no wonder she would never ever ride for me 
She ignores the truth, so she can only get a sigh from me 
She pretends, so she can only get a "why" from me
She's so selfish and disrespectful, doesn't even care about her health - no wonder she turned her back and blind eye from me
She manipulates the Holy Bible but still no comply from me
She changed up the story, but nope still no deny from me 
She's so selfish and disrespectful, that's why she's always moving in stealth - no wonder she wouldn't care if you spy on me

Unless otherwise noted, All content © Brittney Pressley, 2015

Monday, November 9, 2015

Why You Screaming So Loud?

Why you screaming so loud?
Moans streaming so loud?
Pretending like he isn't him
Why you dreaming so loud?
Hiding pain within sex
Why you scheming so loud?
Pretending like he isn't him
Why you beaming so loud?

With every breath in and out
You take in his every lie
The ones he tells himself
When you look in his eyes

You make excuses for why he can't
Why he didn't and why he wouldn't
Why his potential will carry him
Then you stay but you shouldn't

You recognize he has flaws
Just like everyone do
But the flaws that you accept
Say way more about you

He's alive between the sheets

You grab, pull, bite, suck
Gave you the Holy Ghost in bed
Yet, he's still spiritually stuck

Why you screaming so loud?
Moans streaming so loud?
Pretending like he isn't him
Why you dreaming so loud?
Hiding pain within sex
Why you scheming so loud?
Pretending like he isn't him
Why you beaming so loud?

Kept him around for a while
"Thought he'd change eventually"
He only took baby steps
Couldn't help you grow intentionally

Had a vibrant sexual connection
Awareness separated by hyphenation 
You wanted your soul to evolve
While his soul was in hibernation

This is just my observation

Ya'll tried to form a union 
But formed a malformation
You were better off with masturbation
This is just my observation

Saw him in your mind with illustration
But nothing was new, no innovation
This is just my observation

He pissed you off
You blamed it on menstruation
Needed to let go, no mediation
This is just my proclamation

Sex should never hide the truth
Shoulda been told this in our youth

Why you screaming so loud?
Moans streaming so loud?
Pretending like he isn't him
Why you dreaming so loud?
Hiding pain within sex
Why you scheming so loud?
Pretending like he isn't him
Why you beaming so loud?
The lies beginning to cloud
The truth seeming so loud
But you drowned it out with your pleasure
Cuz you was screaming so loud

Unless otherwise noted, All content © Brittney Pressley, 2015

Thursday, July 30, 2015

The Minute I Start Searching For Love From a Man... the minute I have just limited myself. The minute I just boxed myself in. Sounds dramatic to you probably but it makes perfect sense to me. Societally, the fact that women search for (a.k.a chase after) love from a man - and even the reverse, is not only acceptable but it's expected. Maybe that's why the LBGTQ movement gives people in this country the creeps.

But I'm not talking about sex nor sexual preference when I say that love is genderless. Love has zero boundaries. But what women do is box love in & get mad when it shows up with holes n' shit. We'll be like, "I just want love in my life. Seriously, only positive vibes. I just want a man who is gonna love me for me. He don't have to be perfect but God, if he can be between 6'2'' - 6'-6'', nice abs, good job, no kids or no more than two if he's a great dad, no criminal record, nice hair, great in bed, loves to go down, spontaneous, texts me throughout the day, tells me I'm pretty - nah, fuck that, tells me I'm beautiful, only has eyes for me, owns his own business on the side, has a great relationship with his mom, knows how to treat a lady, invests his money, doesn't spend time in the club, doesn't snore, doesn't have a receding hairline, no baby mama drama, has his own place, is respectful, buys me random gifts just to let me know he is thinking about me, likes nature, buys me a side of guacamole @ Chiptotle without me having to ask, drinks but not too much but not too little, listens to me, likes all my girlfriends, gives me space, loves all the music I love, a good kisser, down to earth, not that many followers on Instagram because Social Media ruins relationships, is God fearing, and just someone who is super dope overall. Oh, and please let him not be controlling or insecure like my last boyfriend. AMEN!!"


I have a headache writing all that. Part of that headache stems from my old views on relationships. What I've learned is that, because love is genderless and strictly energy-based; if I deeply desire love to be in my life, I should be open to receive it wherever it comes from. Narrowing down love to a gender, where all members of the gender are not even the same and don't all agree on what being "a man" really means, would be silly. My focus is on connecting - beyond the physical since that's the easiest part. Some of my connections will lead to sex but the majority won't though, I've grown to become so cool with that. I'm open to love coming from strangers, friends, family, and most importantly from myself; not just from a man.

I refuse to box love in or to box myself in. I refuse to quantify love in that getting it from one type of person as opposed to another is better or less than. Because love is not "better" or "less"; it just is and it's relative. And I'm open.

Unless otherwise noted, All content © Brittney Pressley, 2015

Wednesday, July 1, 2015

Little B Survived

I have a difficult time expressing myself at times. It's not that I'm hiding from how I feel, it's more that I feel so strongly that I don't always have the words to describe what it is I'm feeling - let alone including tact. My intuition is so strong that it's creepy. The way I feel energy and people's vibe is amazing - and amazingly creepy lol.

I can remember how I felt as a kid when certain things happened. Not talking just "bad" or hurtful things - euphoric things too. It wasn't until I was about 22/23 years old that I started developing the vocabulary to express how I was really feeling. Words that I use in regular conversation were extremely foreign to me back then: energy, vulnerability, vibe, intention, God, fluidity, confidence, insecurity. Funny how much a difference raising your conscious-level awareness can do.

I'm learning, and have learned, to ask for what I want without apologizing. To be aggressive, bold, and gentle at the same time. To never bite my tongue...for anyone. To not be afraid of letting go of perception or illusion. To never fucking apologize for being myself. To speak up, even if I'm the only one speaking - man, that one was a real difficult one. To demand all thing I desire from the Universe. To trust my instincts. To listen to what I'm feeling. To never let someone convince me of something that I know doesn't feel right. To be honest, even if it means the closest to me will get mad at me. To walk the way I want. To talk the way I want. To dress the way I want. To relax when I feel like it. And that's how Little B...Little Me, survived.

I revived her by giving her life again. I can now articulate the things she wasn't confident enough to talk about. I can now speak up for what I think should or shouldn't be happening because she didn't know she could. I can now let go of all the people who didn't do right by her - even if they are people the world says you should respect no matter what. I can create for her - I can now live out her imagination; and make money doing it.

She doesn't live through me, she lives with me. We are one person now. Lots of people neglected her emotionally, now I got her back. Lots of people laughed at her ideas - now she, rather we, are the funniest people in the room. She was dead for a while but she's back now - more alive than ever. She's having a blast with life. She doesn't live through me, she lives with me. We are one person now.

Unless otherwise noted, All content © Brittney Pressley, 2015

Wednesday, June 3, 2015

Le' Fairy Tale

Brought up watching Disney
Being taught to obsess over becoming a wife
Not once were any of us taught how to
Love ourselves and just live our lives

Well okay, maybe they said it
But the narrative always stayed the same
The only way for us to feel special
Is if a man came alone and changed our name

If a man came along and called us pretty
If a man came along for a steamy fling
If a man texts us throughout the day
If a man came along with a diamond ring

If a man came along and said I love you
If a man came along to take us out to eat
If a man introduces us to his friends
If after a long day he rubs our feet

If he signs up to provide & protect
If he commits himself, promises not to cheat
If he signs up to buy us flowers
If he keeps us wet in between the sheets

So what this has essentially created
Is a huge imbalance within the Earth
Men are searching for external power
While women are searching for men to validate their worth

Now if a man is seaching for his power
How in the hell can he even lead
Yet, you hand him over your heart
Then cry out victim when he makes it bleed

And if you are searching for power too
Without taking any time out to reflect
It will be impossible to build a foundation
Hell, even impossible to simply connect

Women are encouraged to commit to a man
Before ever being encouraged to commit to their purpose
Women spend their lives bidding to be a wife
Then get mad when they are treated just like a purchase

Women'll swear up and down that they are whole
Behind her smile lives her deciet
She prays to God each and every night
To send her a husband to make her complete

Now if you're whole riddle me this
Please explain cuz I need a laugh
If you feel complete within yourself
Then why are you searching for your other half

Not only why are you searching for your other half
But why are you searching for love in general
"...Before You Open Your Legs" was metaphoric
With "Loving Inward..." I was being literal

True power is only located on the inside
That's how you'll learn to sing your song
Don't get mad cuz you don't have a man
Get mad cuz you were taught all wrong

Unless otherwise noted, All content © Brittney Pressley, 2015

Wednesday, May 20, 2015

Crabs In a Barrel

Got some things I wanna say
So let's get straight to it
Melanin makes em' scared
Ain't no great debate to it

If lobsters are free to roam
Then why are crabs in a barell
If this is the land of the free
Then why the crabs can't travel

Conditioning makes us think
That the crabs are in the wrong
But wouldn't your lungs get tired
If you were singing the same song

Wouldn't your feet get sore
From you running the same race
Wouldn't you have issues with self-love
If you were taught to hate your own race

Wouldn't you be at the Doctor's
Asking for drugs cuz you're depressed
Not realizing the pressure that you feel
Is from your soul being supressed

Wouldn't you pick up the bottle
If your daddy was never there
Cuz he got 20 years for a first-time Misdemeanor
And the Judge & Prosecutor didn't care

And let us not forget
It 's not an excuse but it is sad
That he didn't know the power of who he was
Let alone the power in being a dad

Wouldn't you be a little angry
If the media portrays you as a thug
When you're just on a long misguided path
Searching for love, nurture, and a hug

Wouldn't you be a little lost
If your school system never engaged you
And your mom worked two jobs
So God knows who really raised you
And you never learned emotional control
So anything that strikes a chord will enrage you
And if you ever went to college
That student loan debt has enslaved you
Then they taught you their religion
Not telling you awareness of self is what will save you
Then tell you about slavery
But not about the path your ancestors have paved you
If they threw you in the deep-end
Then tossed in a raft and said they saved you
If you learned you're a pawn in their game
And the only reason they're winning is cuz they played you

If they hire you to work a job
Like they are doing you a favor
As if they didn't build a financial blueprint
From years of your forced free labor

If they portrayed you as a savage
Then convinced the world you are a monkey
And the same place they bogart resources from
They convince you is a third-world country

If there is a reoccurring epidemic
That is so common but is sick
White women are taught to hate black culture
But boy do they love them some black dick

If they sign you up for the Rat Race
But never teach you how to run
And if your pants are kinda sagging
They'll convince themselves you have a gun

If you have a baby really young
They'll look in your face, call you a whore
But make government assistance super enticing
Just to entice you to have some more

If they don't teach you true mathematics
But beat it into you that you are less than
Then when you add it all up
You realize that you are blessed, man

Cuz they can put you in a barell
But can never kill your soul
While they'd love to keep you broken
Looking inside will make you whole

Never let em' clip your wings
Never apologize or say 'I'm sorry'
For doing what you were created to do
Exceling in your God Body

Unless otherwise noted, All content © Brittney Pressley, 2015

Monday, April 20, 2015

Finally Sober

T'was the morning after. I was hungover as shit. Looking for some Advil. Some eggs and some grits

My head was still pounding. My stomach feeling light. My hair was all messy. And the sun was too bright

Went to wash my face. I was looking like hell. Shirt was on backwards. Couldn't find my cell

This felt too familiar. You know what they say. When your life is all crazy. It's best that you pray

So, "God please forgive me. I chose to ignore. That four shots was enough. I won't drink no more. If you grant me one wish. Make this headache disappear. Promise to be nicer. And not so insincere. Promise I'll give back. Maybe even stop cursing. Fuck! Now my stomach hurts. This needs some reversing"

Then a light bulb went off. I'm so drunk all the time. It's not even with alcohol. Tequila...salt...lime

I'm intoxicated off lies. That I tell to myself. About who is who, what is what. Who belongs on what shelf

I alter the reality. Cater to the vision that I want. It's like the book is already written. But I went ahead and changed the font

It's like they showed me who they were. But I made them out to be much more. I knew they weren't a Virgin Mary. Convinced myself they weren't a whore

Then I looked around a bit. Realized most people here are drunk. Lying to themselves about who they are. Where they're at and what they want

They are drunk up in their marriage. Drunk in "love" when they're having sex. Drunk while they are parenting children. Drunk when they say they have self-respect

Drunk while they're posting on Facebook. Level 2 drunk while they're at work. Level 5 drunk when they convince themselves. That their relationship will work

Drunk when they say they are loyal. Then get pissed when you don't have their back. Super drunk when they say "I love you". You must be hammered cuz you said it back

Drunk when they say they're happy. Drunk when they say they feel all loved. You confront them about being drunk. They say, "No, I'm not drunk girl I am buzzed"

Well not only are you drunk. You are so god damn insecure. Keep asking ME for this and that. But too scared to ask YOURSELF for more

If you can look into the mirror. Tell a bold face lie about who you see. There's no question in my mind. You'll have no problem lying to me

I know the blind can't lead the blind. And the drunk can't lead the drunk. So in order to make the world better. I promised myself I'll sober up

Promise to be my unadulterated self. If you're having a pow wow please don't invite me. If everyone there is gonna be drunk. And talking about BS cuz it don't excite me

Cuz when I walk into that bitch. Time to sober up for everybody. Let's have our vodka and our wine. But still, have a sober party

If your energy is out of wack. Don't expect me to hug, hug, & kiss, kiss you. The reality of what you can expect. Is that I will politely and humbly dismiss you

I've got no more time for games. I've been around drunk people for far too long. That I learned to be drunk myself. Before I learned that being drunk was wrong

When you wake up in the morning. You thank God for new breaths and a new day. But are you thankful if those breaths. Are used to lie about who you are and what you say

You claim to be so, so, so, so confident. Then why are you searching for validation? Laughing so motherfuckin' loud. To disguise you are lost in the conversation

It's always everyone else's fault. You've fallen in love with playing victim. You've gone from a spiritual being to a robot. You've fallen perfectly within the system

And it's okay if you think I'm mean. It's taken me years to learn my worth. So no, I won't invest my time in you. Cuz I don't know how much more of that I have on this earth

I'm no longer looking for Advil. Even though some days I'll be hungover. This time it won't be from being drunk. It'll be from celebrating that now I'm sober

Unless otherwise noted, All content © Brittney Pressley, 2015

Friday, April 17, 2015

Shady Bitches

I'd like to humbly address all of you shady bitches
The ones who sell their souls to gain some shady riches
The ones who have no morals and are completely off the grid
The ones who would sadly, but gladly choose a man before their kids
The ones who always complain about a problem with their friends
But don't realize they're always causing problems cuz their drama never ends
The ones who always have their hand out, not a problem when they beg
The ones who try to solve their issues with their mouths and between their legs
The ones who take advantage of people just because they can
The ones who want to be treated like a lady but are still thinking like a man
The ones who always want the truth but don't flinch to tell a lie
The ones who need to be dismissed but always scream "bye Felicia, bye"
The ones who can't keep a job but you'll always find them in the store
The ones where you can give them the world and they'll still be wanting more
The ones who claim to be confident but are so deeply insecure
The ones who claim to be grown but are so emotionally immature
The ones who'll be offended just because I called them a bitch
But they consciously allow disrespect from a man without even a flinch
Just because when she sends him a text he responds back pretty quick
And cuz he can buy a car, buy a house, and give her dick
And cuz he gives her the attention that Papa Bear never gave her
She puts her faith in him thinking that he's the one who'll save her
And when he came into her life she was so happy to have a dude
That she cut off her girls and her fam and didn't care if it was rude
Doesn't realize he is shady too but by his side is where she's glued
And he controls it all -  money, perception and her mood
And let's not forget her mom, because that's her daughter too
Mama Bear was doing the same exact things and she taught her too
So the cycle just repeats and repeats and repeats
He mistreats, she retreats, he deceits, she retreats
And instead of living a life filled with love and filled with bliss
She's settled for a life where she's acting like a Shady Bitch.

Unless otherwise noted, All content © Brittney Pressley, 2015

Thursday, March 12, 2015


Self-love is the best love
I love me, who cares about the rest's love
All around, North, East, South, West love
Smile through it all, that Colgate and that Crest love

It's hilarious, they call you cocky when you love yourself
They'd rather you love some, but not all of yourself
They'd rather you beat yourself up and then shove yourself
Tell em' it doesn't fit, they must acquit, OJ glove yourself

It's not negative to look in the mirror and think "God damn"
You've connected to your beauty through your scars, I mean God damn
Your imperfections make you perfecto, sir or madame
Overcoming pain and guilt make you a masterpiece, I mean God damn

People will try to dim your light and tell you it's not kosher
To be drunk in love with yourself when you tell em' you're not sober
Your confidence drives them crazy but you're not their chauffeur
You've got higher ranking cards but baby this is not poker

You've spent so many years engulfed in self-hate
Hating your body, hating your life, thinking you're not great
Thinking you weren't good enough and that was not innate
Someone put that all on you, transferring their dead weight

So that hate was permeating from the inside
"You're not worth it" is what negative self-talk implied
Your thoughts were dark and all of your actions complied
You were going through the motions taking absolutely nothing in stride

But then you had this bright moment, a coming to Jesus
A moment when pigs start to fly and hell finally freezes
A moment when you realize no one can actually love you to pieces
Until to start to love yourself, a come into your genius

You start to abandon insecurity and examine your heart
You start to realize you are worth it, bullseye from the dart
You start to embrace your quirkiness as succulent art
You understand that every dumb choice is what made you smart

Now when you wear confidence there will be haters and doubters
Who liked you better when you were negative, so they hate louder and louder
They try to keep you on their level so they throw you depressants and downers
But you cut that cord and they are pissed you took back all of your power

Even though love binds the universe, human love is subjective
Everyone's definition of what love is, is from their own perspective
Judging whether you're worth love by someone's actions would be ineffective
It has to be judged by your own energy in order for it to be not defective

Even still, being loved by anyone should not define you
How much you learn to love yourself will actually align you
Then you can feel infinite love from God, that's the Divine you
Anyone who doesn't understand this whole poem will confine you
Say hello to 'aggressive you' and goodbye to 'benign you'
Have fun connecting to your purpose that was assigned you
Try not to be offended next time someone declines you
You validate yourself no one else needs to cosign you

Unless otherwise noted, All content © Brittney Pressley, 2015

Saturday, February 14, 2015

The Idea of Me

In hindsight I'm realizing
Too many people loved the idea of me
Who I was at the core
Had the same ones intimidated and scared of me

They acted like they cared for me
When they looked at me and stared at me
My intensity challenged their soul
And their soul wasn't even prepared for me

Compared to me
They were visually impaired to me
Couldn't see themselves, couldn't see the light
And I was who they feared to be

Since I was who they feared to be
It explains why they focused on repairing me
Not to fix me but to dim me
Cuz they weren't a quarter of who I dared to be

And so I guess I was scared to see
If in-depth love really did exist
Instead of being open to receiving love
I walked around life with balled up fists

I wondered what the hell was wrong with me
Wondered why I never felt love up close
"Where's my nurture?", "Where's my hug?"
"Where is my love when I need it most?"

I thought I was pretty God damn cool
I thought I was pretty God damn kind
I thought I was pretty God damn lovable
Or maybe I had lost my God damn mind

Or maybe I wasn't worth true love at all
Funny how someone so confident coulda had that thought
Funny how much I've learned since then
Super thankful I abandoned negative self talk I was taught

Love exists whether we think we deserve it or not
We can put it in our cart or leave it on the shelf
No one can authentically give or receive love
If we don't authentically love ourselves

And so to those lovers of the idea of me
Thank you for the insight, I am so glad
This goes for ex-boyfriends, ex-acquaintances
Teachers, society, both mom and dad

The reason why you couldn't love all of me
Is because you couldn't even love all that of you
So who was lying? You, when you said, "I love you"?
Or me, when I said "I love you too"?

There's no turning back now, I love myself
Not everyone deserves my emotions, time, or energy
Either we connect and move on forward
Or we don't and you'll be a distant memory
No love lost, none gained, no synergy
No O2, no fire, no chemistry
No hard feelings, no feeling bad, no empathy

Unless otherwise noted, All content © Brittney Pressley, 2015

Sunday, December 21, 2014

I'm Not a Feminist

I think it's funny, all the ambiguity I get from the title of my book
Never thought starting with 'Open Your Mind' would get me all these funny looks
But I guess when you have 'mind' and 'legs' in the same exact sentence
It causes confusion and now everyone is the juror and I am the defendant

Some people think I'm talking sex, some people think I'm talking virgin
Some people think I'm talking kinky, some people think I'm talking searching
Some people think I'm talking feminism, some people think I'm dissin Steve [Harvey]
Some people don't know it's none of the above and I'm only talking what I see

Feminism at it's core is about women being equal of that to men
I have no concern in the world about being equal n shit to them
Men have certain power and I respect them for that too
Women also have certain power and we need to respect that we do

Being equal can't really be measured, it's like non-quantifiable
We can cohesively work together, I think that's non, well undeniable
I'm not talking equal pay, or equal rights, or equal positions
I'm talking soul, I'm talking flaws, I'm talking love, I'm talking intuition

Look, I'm all for women coming up - I'll call it the empowering of ladies
I'm also for accountability, not acting like we are pooping daises
Or that we are pooping roses, or that we are pooping pink
Or that we are number one because when we all go number two all of that shit stinks

Open Your Mind Before You Open Your Legs is like hitting the button refresh
It's stopping to analyze your past and using it to determine what comes next
Open Your Mind Before You Open Your Legs is like hitting the button refresh
It's about learning to open up to vulnerability before opening up to sex
Open Your Mind Before You Open Your Legs is like hitting the button refresh
It's about learning how energy works you have to give to get respect
Open Your Mind Before You Open Your Legs is like hitting the button refresh
It's about slowing yourself down and taking time to reflect

…but I am not a feminist.

Unless otherwise noted, All content © Brittney Pressley, 2014